Your spouse, partner, lover, fiance can never be your best friend.

He* can be more. He can be less. But he will never be your best friend. It is extremely important to make peace with it, even more so when that ‘special someone’ is going to be there, in your life in the long run.

Now why do I say this? Very simple. A best friend, is okay with the worst-you. Also no matter how much you love your best friend, his life and the decisions he makes are never going to affect your life. So the fact that he is a womanizer, who sometimes likes to hang out with the queers, loves the color purple, wears parrot green socks matched with an equally green boa, will never hamper your friendship with him. If you are hangin with company that might be a teeny-tiny vary of his colorful life, you will stand up for him, get into a cat fight, and show off the opponent’s kidney on your drawing room Mantle, for your coming generation’s to see.

Now imagine this was your fiance, we are talking about.

First of all, let’s suppose you have a real awful taste in Men, and you do find the above mentioned Sir, rather sexy, would you actually go out with him?… Knowing that he’s the man the world will associate you with?..That you might one day be sitting on stage with the guy whose real name nobody knows, since everyone has their own pet name for him… and no its not cause everyone loves it him.

..hence established he’s not your best friend and neither are you his.

Also remember, he needs to trust you. and you need to make sure that that trust is 100%. Work for a few months. Trust me, until its some psycho-convict-rapist-serial-killer type you are getting jiggy with, normal men don’t take longer than that. Cause if tomorrow, someone comes up to him and tells him that they think you are/ were up to no good or some other version of that. He should atleast come and clarify it with you. Unfortunatly, the kind of society that we function in, this happens to almost every girl out there… and let’s be honest, we all do have histories.. rather colorful, interesting ones… Now let’s suppose you say something really really nasty about a best friend of your who you just had a huge fight with. This fight was mostly your fault (we obviously blame it on the hormones)… chances are a few weeks down the line you two are going to get back to being BFFs.. However let me take you inside your dude’s head..let’s suppose you have a fight with his best friend, or his sister, or cousin or mom.. He will dig this memory out and agree to whatever the other person is saying. if not 100% than atleast 50%. He will have seen you falter. He will be aware of your mortal-ness. I am not saying he will not love you. He will just not trust you.

…and this means head-fucks you could have avoided, if you were just a little smarter.

Furthermore, you are bound to get in to nasty nasty shit-fights with your guy. Frequencies differ, but everyone does. Most men and women have the tendency to dig out the worst about eachother and get into mud-slinging. You always want to have the last word in. You do not want him to show you a mirror. Not many women have the heart to stomach that stuff, as honest as it would be.

..your best friends can call you a slut, albeit jokingly, but they can. They can know about the dude you cheated on, with his best friend. They can tell you that the red nail paint is making you look like a tramp and get away with it. It just not funny when its your guy whose saying things like that. Just like how its not cool for a girlfriend/ fiance/ wife to call her own husband gay jokingly.

So yeah, if you’re still romantically naive, and you believe that your true love, is going to be your husband, who you will never ever lie to and manipulate, and he will also happen to be your best friend, then My love, read this one again and trust me.

Your guy is never your best friend.

*Insert she/her if you are a guy